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Envelope-to: oyetunde.folarin@rcm.edu.ng
Delivery-date: Mon, 25 Sep 2023 01:31:34 -0400
From: Oluwatoyin Ajilore-Chukwuemeka <hellotoyinajilore@gmail.com>
To: Oluwaseun Folarin <oyetunde.folarin@rcm.edu.ng>
Subject: On Relationships and Evolution 3
Sender: noreply@sp.eocampaign1.com
MIME-Version: 1.0
Date: Mon, 25 Sep 2023 05:30:45 +0000
Message-ID: <9cdc48508a6c370a2caa866197019440@sp.eocampaign1.com>
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DEAR OLUWASEUN,=0D=0A=0D=0AHow are you doing this week=3F=0D=0A=0D=0ASo, th=
is is the first time I have a part 3 of a mail topic=F0=9F=98=85. But I=0D=
=0Arealized it=C2=A0was needed=C2=A0because I got a good number=0D=0Aof=C2=
=A0really=C2=A0brilliant questions about my last email. Many of them=0D=0Aa=
sked similar things, so I will summarize them in this question:=0D=0A=0D=0A=
_=E2=80=9CShould this be the norm in very close friendships=3F=C2=A0__Shoul=
d I=0D=0Ahave someone I call my female best friend and vice versa but be ok=
ay=0D=0Aif they=E2=80=99re=C2=A0purposely=C2=A0holding back key things in t=
heir life__.=E2=80=9D_=0D=0A=0D=0AHere=E2=80=99s the summary of my answer.=
=0D=0A=0D=0AThe key word I am holding onto here is PURPOSELY.=C2=A0Before I=
 can give a=0D=0Adirect answer to this, I will emphasize that my assumption=
 of=0D=0Awhat=C2=A0purposely=C2=A0means in this situation is malicious, whi=
ch=0D=0Ameans=C2=A0wrongful intention. It is about=C2=A0intentionally=C2=A0=
doing something=0D=0Athat hurts someone else.=0D=0A=0D=0AHaving said that, =
my answer to that question is No.=0D=0A=0D=0AThe boundaries of what I was s=
peaking about in the last two emails are=0D=0Aabout friendships where you h=
ave at least some sense of good faith and=0D=0Aunfeigned love.=C2=A0The kin=
d of friendship where you are confident the=0D=0Aother person will not=C2=
=A0deliberately=C2=A0harm or hurt you. If that=0D=0Afoundation is missing, =
then everything I said in the last 2 weeks does=0D=0Anot apply. That is not=
 the kind of relationship I was talking about.=0D=0A=0D=0AThe important que=
stion then is: What do you do in a situation=0D=0Adescribed by this questio=
n=3F I am not a relationship expert, but I have=0D=0Aa couple of suggestion=
s:=0D=0A=0D=0A=09* APPROACH IT WITH PATIENT KINDNESS.=0D=0A=0D=0ADon=E2=80=
=99t jump to the conclusion that it was purposeful until you=C2=A0are=0D=0A=
convinced=C2=A0beyond all doubt that you=E2=80=99re right. And even then, s=
till,=0D=0Agive the benefit of the doubt while=C2=A0actively=C2=A0seeking t=
o protect your=0D=0Asanity.=C2=A0Honestly, things are not always the way th=
ey seem. Especially=0D=0Awhen it comes to what is happening in other people=
=E2=80=99s life. You=0D=0Adon=E2=80=99t know what is happening on their end=
 until you know. So don=E2=80=99t=0D=0Aassume purposefulness. You might not=
 know what makes it difficult for=0D=0Athem to share. If you=E2=80=99re a b=
eliever, talk to God about it and let=0D=0Ahim give you His perspective. Be=
 quick to give the benefit of the=0D=0Adoubt.=0D=0A=0D=0A=09* PROTECT YOUR =
SANITY.=0D=0A=0D=0AYou=E2=80=99re not the sacrifice for the friendship; don=
=E2=80=99t make yourself=0D=0Aone.=C2=A0Jesus already died to save the most=
 important relationship you=0D=0Aneed to have: the one with God, so you don=
=E2=80=99t need to die for any=0D=0Aother relationship. Extend the kindness=
 both to the other party and to=0D=0Ayourself. Protect your emotions. Prote=
ct your mental space. Keep=0D=0Ayourself in a worldview that empowers you, =
not belittles you. It=E2=80=99s=0D=0Aokay to=C2=A0be hurt, but you don=E2=
=80=99t need to stay hurt=C2=A0just=C2=A0to protect=0D=0Asomeone else. Alwa=
ys know that you are responsible for your own=0D=0Aprotection, not your fri=
end.=0D=0A=0D=0A=09* RE-EVALUATE THE RELATIONSHIP=0D=0A=0D=0ABe honest with=
 yourself and reevaluate the friendship. Was it=0D=0Aone-sided all along, a=
nd you=C2=A0just=C2=A0didn=E2=80=99t notice=3F=C2=A0Has the other=0D=0Apers=
on been=C2=A0consistently emotionally=C2=A0unavailable and malicious, or=0D=
=0Awas this=C2=A0just=C2=A0the first time=3F Are there signs things will tu=
rn=0D=0Aaround, or do you need to face the fact that this is the reality=3F=
=C2=A0Is=0D=0AGod saying something to your heart about how to handle the=0D=
=0Arelationship (regardless of how you=E2=80=99re feeling)=3F Are you willi=
ng to=0D=0Acontinue=3F Friendships are not do-or-die. If it is not working,=
 it is=0D=0Anot working.=0D=0A=0D=0AAnother important part of letting relat=
ionships evolve is knowing when=0D=0Ato let things go. There=C2=A0are indee=
d=C2=A0times when things are beyond you,=0D=0Aand the way to save the relat=
ionship is to release it. I truly hope=0D=0Ayou continue to grow the wisdom=
 you need to manage your relationships.=0D=0A=0D=0ALet me know if this is h=
elpful.=0D=0A=0D=0A_Love always,=0D=0AOluwatoyin._ =0D=0A=0D=0A =09=09 [lin=
kedin social link]=0D=0A[https://sptr.eocampaign1.com/f/a/xhEskVFOTguq6Ysst=
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=0D=0A=09=09 [website social link] [https://sptr.eocampaign1.com/f/a/fUrh3-=
lFbrx7bHUkHwb9ww~~/AAAHUQA~/RgRm86AFP0QlaHR0cHM6Ly9vbHV3YXRveWluYWppbG9yZS5=
kaXNoYS5wYWdlL1cFc3BjZXVCCmUABRsRZWPMQl1SG295ZXR1bmRlLmZvbGFyaW5AcmNtLmVkdS=
5uZ1gEAABKnA~~] =0D=0A=0D=0A_If this is your first time receiving an email =
from me, Welcome to my=0D=0Amailing community! You are here because you int=
eracted with me through=0D=0Aany of my offerings or speaking engagements. _=
=0D=0A_____This is=C2=A0IN-SIGHTS=C2=A0mailing community, where I share my =
weekly=0D=0Ainsights (pun intended). Here, I share my meditations to call y=
ou to=0D=0Atake a closer, longer, and deeper look at everyday events so we =
can=0D=0Adraw out wisdom for living. I am sure you are going to love it her=
e!=0D=0AExpect my emails on Mondays, all things being equal. And yes, I lov=
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ble>=0D=0A                                                                <=
/td>=0D=0A                                                            </tr>=
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                                              <table role=3D"presentation" =
border=3D"0" class=3D"container" align=3D"center" cellpadding=3D"0" cellspa=
cing=3D"0" style=3D"margin-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 5px; padding-bottom: 5=
px;" eo-row=3D"one-column" bgcolor=3D"" width=3D"100%">=0D=0A              =
                                          <tbody>=0D=0A                    =
                                        <tr>=0D=0A                         =
                                       <td width=3D"100%" class=3D"containe=
r" style=3D"padding: 0 15px 15px;" eo-block-container=3D"">=0D=0A          =
                                                          =0D=0A           =
                                                         <table role=3D"pre=
sentation" cellspacing=3D"0" cellpadding=3D"0" border=3D"0" align=3D"center=
" width=3D"100%" eo-block=3D"title" bgcolor=3D"">=0D=0A                    =
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        <td width=3D"100%" style=3D"text-decoration: none; padding-top: 5px=
; padding-bottom: 15px;" class=3D"container text-block"><h1 style=3D"margin=
-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; font-size: 26px; line-height: 1; text-align:=
 justify; color: rgb(49, 54, 56);">Dear Oluwaseun,</h1></td>=0D=0A         =
                                                                   </tr>=0D=
=0A                                                                        =
</tbody>=0D=0A                                                             =
       </table>=0D=0A                                                      =
              =0D=0A                                                       =
             <table role=3D"presentation" cellspacing=3D"0" cellpadding=3D"=
0" border=3D"0" align=3D"center" width=3D"100%" eo-block=3D"text" bgcolor=
=3D"" style=3D"margin-top: 7px; margin-bottom: 9px;">=0D=0A                =
                                                        <tbody>=0D=0A      =
                                                                      <tr>=
=0D=0A                                                                     =
           <td class=3D"container" style=3D"padding: 4px 8px 20px 4px;">=0D=
=0A                                                                        =
            <div class=3D"text-block" style=3D"color: rgb(49, 54, 56); line=
-height: 150%;"><div data-offset-key=3D"15ie8-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; m=
argin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; position: relative; white-space: pre=
-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=
=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-family: Geor=
gia, Times, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif; font-size: 18px;">How are y=
ou doing this week=3F</span></div><div data-offset-key=3D"15ie8-0-0" style=
=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; position: relativ=
e; white-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><span style=
=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times Ne=
w Roman', serif;"><br></span></span></div><div data-offset-key=3D"4ikbb-0-0=
" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; position: =
relative; white-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><spa=
n data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outli=
ne: 0px; font-size: 18px; font-family: Georgia, Times, &quot;Times New Roma=
n&quot;, serif;">So, this is the first time I have a part 3 of a mail topic=
=F0=9F=98=85. But I realized it&nbsp;</span><span style=3D"font-family: Geo=
rgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><s=
pan data-offset-key=3D"4ikbb-1-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; borde=
r: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; marg=
in: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">was needed</span></span><span data-tex=
t=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">=
&nbsp;because I got a good number of&nbsp;</span><span data-offset-key=3D"4=
ikbb-3-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><=
span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; ou=
tline: 0px;">really</span></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding:=
 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp;brilliant questions ab=
out my last email. Many of them asked similar things, so I will summarize t=
hem in this question:</span></span></span></div><div style=3D"text-align: c=
enter;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', seri=
f;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><br><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"=
padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><em>=E2=80=9CShould =
this be the norm in very close friendships=3F&nbsp;</em></span><em><span da=
ta-offset-key=3D"ccv36-1-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px=
; outline: 0px; font-style: italic;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padd=
ing: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">Should I have someone I =
call my female best friend and vice versa but be okay if they=E2=80=99re&nb=
sp;</span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"ccv36-2-0" style=3D"padding: 0px;=
 margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: italic;"><span data-te=
xt=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"=
>purposely</span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"ccv36-3-0" style=3D"paddin=
g: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: italic;"><span =
data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline=
: 0px;">&nbsp;holding back key things in their life</span></span></em><span=
 data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outlin=
e: 0px;"><em>.=E2=80=9D</em></span><br><null><br></null></span></span></div=
><div data-offset-key=3D"994lk-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; bor=
der: 0px; outline: 0px; position: relative; white-space: pre-wrap; directio=
n: ltr; text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, '=
Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span data-text=
=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">H=
ere=E2=80=99s the summary of my answer.</span></span></span></div><div styl=
e=3D"text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Tim=
es New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><br></span></span><=
/div><div data-offset-key=3D"7uj2h-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px;=
 border: 0px; outline: 0px; position: relative; white-space: pre-wrap; dire=
ction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Time=
s, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span data-t=
ext=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;=
">The key word I am holding onto here is PURPOSELY.&nbsp;</span><span data-=
offset-key=3D"7uj2h-1-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; o=
utline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; =
border: 0px; outline: 0px;">Before I can give a direct answer to this, I wi=
ll emphasize that my assumption of what&nbsp;</span></span><span data-offse=
t-key=3D"7uj2h-2-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outlin=
e: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; borde=
r: 0px; outline: 0px;">purposely</span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"7uj2=
h-3-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><spa=
n data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outli=
ne: 0px;">&nbsp;means in this situation is malicious, which means&nbsp;</sp=
an></span><span data-offset-key=3D"7uj2h-3-1" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin=
: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"><=
span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; ou=
tline: 0px;">wrongful intention</span></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=
=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">. It is about&nb=
sp;</span><span data-offset-key=3D"7uj2h-5-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin=
: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"paddin=
g: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">intentionally</span></span=
><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; =
outline: 0px;">&nbsp;doing something that hurts someone else.</span></span>=
</span></div><div style=3D"text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-family=
: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px=
;"><br></span></span></div><div data-offset-key=3D"1p0c5-0-0" style=3D"padd=
ing: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; position: relative; white=
-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font=
-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-siz=
e: 18px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; bord=
er: 0px; outline: 0px;">Having said that, my answer to that question is No.=
</span></span></span></div><div style=3D"text-align: justify;"><span style=
=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"=
font-size: 18px;"><br></span></span></div><div data-offset-key=3D"84bgl-0-0=
" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; position: =
relative; white-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><spa=
n style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span st=
yle=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span data-offset-key=3D"84bgl-0-0" style=3D"paddi=
ng: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" =
style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">The boundar=
ies of what I was speaking about in the last two emails are about friendshi=
ps where you have at least some sense of good faith and unfeigned love</spa=
n></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; borde=
r: 0px; outline: 0px;">.&nbsp;</span><span data-offset-key=3D"84bgl-2-0" st=
yle=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-te=
xt=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"=
>The kind of friendship where you are confident the other person will not&n=
bsp;</span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"84bgl-3-0" style=3D"padding: 0px=
; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=
=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">deliberately</sp=
an></span><span data-offset-key=3D"84bgl-4-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin=
: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"paddin=
g: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp;harm or hurt you</sp=
an></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; bord=
er: 0px; outline: 0px;">. If that foundation is missing, then everything I =
said in the last 2 weeks does not apply. That is not the kind of relationsh=
ip I was talking about.</span></span></span></div><div style=3D"text-align:=
 justify;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', s=
erif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><br></span></span></div><div data-o=
ffset-key=3D"2tbdj-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; ou=
tline: 0px; position: relative; white-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text=
-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Ro=
man', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span data-text=3D"true" sty=
le=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">The important =
question then is: What do you do in a situation described by this question=
=3F I am not a relationship expert, but I have a couple of suggestions:</sp=
an></span></span></div><ul data-offset-key=3D"fh54b-0-0" style=3D"padding: =
0px; margin: 16px 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; color: rgb(17, 17, 17); f=
ont-family: &quot;Libre Baskerville&quot;, serif; font-size: 17px; font-sty=
le: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font=
-weight: 400; letter-spacing: -0.2px; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-i=
ndent: 0px; text-transform: none; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-tex=
t-stroke-width: 0px; white-space: pre-wrap; background-color: rgb(250, 250,=
 250); text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; =
text-decoration-color: initial;"><li data-block=3D"true" data-editor=3D"f8v=
r4" data-offset-key=3D"fh54b-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 0p=
x 1.5em; border: 0px; outline: 0px; direction: ltr; list-style-type: disc; =
position: relative; counter-reset: ol0 0; text-align: justify;"><span style=
=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"=
font-size: 18px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0=
px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><strong>Approach it with patient kindness.<=
/strong></span></span></span></li></ul><div data-offset-key=3D"5nst3-0-0" s=
tyle=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; position: rel=
ative; white-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><span s=
tyle=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=
=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margi=
n: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">Don=E2=80=99t jump to the conclusion th=
at it was purposeful until you&nbsp;</span><span data-offset-key=3D"5nst3-1=
-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span d=
ata-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline:=
 0px;">are convinced</span></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding=
: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp;beyond all doubt that=
 you=E2=80=99re right. And even then, still, give the benefit of the doubt =
while&nbsp;</span><span data-offset-key=3D"5nst3-3-0" style=3D"padding: 0px=
; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=
=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">actively</span><=
/span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: =
0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp;seeking to protect your sanity.&nbsp;</span><span=
 data-offset-key=3D"5nst3-5-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: =
0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin:=
 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">Honestly</span></span><span data-text=3D"=
true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">, thi=
ngs are not always the way they seem. Especially when it comes to what is h=
appening in other people=E2=80=99s life. You don=E2=80=99t know what is hap=
pening on their end until you know. So don=E2=80=99t assume purposefulness.=
 You might not know what makes it difficult for them to share. If you=E2=80=
=99re a believer, talk to God about it and let him give you His perspective=
. Be quick to give the benefit of the doubt.</span></span></span></div><ul=
 data-offset-key=3D"399fp-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 16px 0px; bor=
der: 0px; outline: 0px; color: rgb(17, 17, 17); font-family: &quot;Libre Ba=
skerville&quot;, serif; font-size: 17px; font-style: normal; font-variant-l=
igatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spaci=
ng: -0.2px; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform=
: none; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white=
-space: pre-wrap; background-color: rgb(250, 250, 250); text-decoration-thi=
ckness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: ini=
tial;"><li data-block=3D"true" data-editor=3D"f8vr4" data-offset-key=3D"399=
fp-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 0px 1.5em; border: 0px; outl=
ine: 0px; direction: ltr; list-style-type: disc; position: relative; counte=
r-reset: ol0 0; text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, =
Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span da=
ta-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: =
0px;"><strong>Protect your sanity.</strong></span></span></span></li></ul><=
div data-offset-key=3D"581dh-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; borde=
r: 0px; outline: 0px; position: relative; white-space: pre-wrap; direction:=
 ltr; text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Ti=
mes New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span data-text=3D=
"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">You=
=E2=80=99re not the sacrifice for the friendship; don=E2=80=99t make yourse=
lf one.&nbsp;</span><span data-offset-key=3D"581dh-1-0" style=3D"padding: 0=
px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=
=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">Jesus already di=
ed to save the most important relationship you need to have: the one with G=
od, so you don=E2=80=99t need to die for any other relationship</span></spa=
n><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px;=
 outline: 0px;">. Extend the kindness both to the other party and to yourse=
lf. Protect your emotions. Protect your mental space. Keep yourself in a wo=
rldview that empowers you, not belittles you. It=E2=80=99s okay to&nbsp;</s=
pan><span data-offset-key=3D"581dh-3-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px;=
 border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px=
; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">be hurt</span></span><span data-=
text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px=
;">, but you don=E2=80=99t need to stay hurt&nbsp;</span><span data-offset-=
key=3D"581dh-5-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline:=
 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border:=
 0px; outline: 0px;">just</span></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"pa=
dding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp;to protect someo=
ne else. Always know that you are responsible for your own protection, not =
your friend.</span></span></span></div><ul data-offset-key=3D"aqcbr-0-0" st=
yle=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 16px 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; color: rg=
b(17, 17, 17); font-family: &quot;Libre Baskerville&quot;, serif; font-size=
: 17px; font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-ca=
ps: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: -0.2px; orphans: 2; text-alig=
n: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; widows: 2; word-spacing: =
0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white-space: pre-wrap; background-colo=
r: rgb(250, 250, 250); text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-=
style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"><li data-block=3D"true" da=
ta-editor=3D"f8vr4" data-offset-key=3D"aqcbr-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; ma=
rgin: 0px 0px 0px 1.5em; border: 0px; outline: 0px; direction: ltr; list-st=
yle-type: disc; position: relative; counter-reset: ol0 0; text-align: justi=
fy;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"=
><span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding=
: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><strong>Re-evaluate the rel=
ationship</strong></span></span></span></li></ul><div data-offset-key=3D"57=
pjp-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; pos=
ition: relative; white-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify=
;"><span style=3D"font-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><=
span style=3D"font-size: 18px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: =
0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">Be honest with yourself and r=
eevaluate the friendship. Was it one-sided all along, and you&nbsp;</span><=
span data-offset-key=3D"57pjp-1-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; bord=
er: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; mar=
gin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">just</span></span><span data-text=3D"=
true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp=
;didn=E2=80=99t notice=3F&nbsp;</span><span data-offset-key=3D"57pjp-3-0" s=
tyle=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-t=
ext=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;=
">Has the other person been&nbsp;</span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"57p=
jp-4-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><sp=
an data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outl=
ine: 0px;">consistently</span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"57pjp-5-0" st=
yle=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-te=
xt=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"=
> </span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"57pjp-6-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; =
margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"=
padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">emotionally</span></=
span><span data-offset-key=3D"57pjp-7-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px=
; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0p=
x; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp;unavailable and malicious=
, or was this&nbsp;</span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"57pjp-8-0" style=
=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=
=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">j=
ust</span></span><span data-offset-key=3D"57pjp-9-0" style=3D"padding: 0px;=
 margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D=
"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp;the first tim=
e</span></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px;=
 border: 0px; outline: 0px;">=3F Are there signs things will turn around, o=
r do you need to face the fact that this is the reality=3F&nbsp;</span><spa=
n data-offset-key=3D"57pjp-11-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border=
: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margi=
n: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">Is God saying something to your heart a=
bout how to handle the relationship (regardless of how you=E2=80=99re feeli=
ng)</span></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0p=
x; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">=3F Are you willing to continue=3F Friendshi=
ps are not do-or-die. If it is not working, it is not working.</span></span=
></span></div><div style=3D"text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-famil=
y: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: 18p=
x;"><br></span></span></div><div data-offset-key=3D"54ibs-0-0" style=3D"pad=
ding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; position: relative; whit=
e-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"fon=
t-family: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-si=
ze: 18px;"><span data-offset-key=3D"54ibs-0-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margi=
n: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"paddi=
ng: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">Another important part of=
 letting relationships evolve is knowing when to let things go</span></span=
><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; =
outline: 0px;">. There&nbsp;</span><span data-offset-key=3D"54ibs-2-0" styl=
e=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;"><span data-text=
=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">a=
re indeed</span></span><span data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; marg=
in: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px;">&nbsp;times when things are beyond you=
, and the way to save the relationship is to release it. I truly hope you c=
ontinue to grow the wisdom you need to manage your relationships.</span></s=
pan></span></div><div style=3D"text-align: justify;"><span style=3D"font-fa=
mily: Georgia, Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style=3D"font-size: =
18px;"><null><br></null></span></span></div><div data-offset-key=3D"54ibs-0=
-0" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; outline: 0px; position=
: relative; white-space: pre-wrap; direction: ltr; text-align: justify;"><s=
pan data-text=3D"true" style=3D"padding: 0px; margin: 0px; border: 0px; out=
line: 0px; font-size: 18px; font-family: Georgia, Times, &quot;Times New Ro=
man&quot;, serif;">Let me know if this is helpful.</span></div><br><div sty=
le=3D"text-align: justify;"><em style=3D"box-sizing: border-box; text-size-=
adjust: 100%;"><span style=3D"box-sizing: border-box; text-size-adjust: 100=
%; background-color: rgb(250, 197, 28); font-size: 18px; font-family: Georg=
ia, Times, &quot;Times New Roman&quot;, serif;"><strong><span style=3D"colo=
r: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Love always,<br style=3D"box-sizing: border-box; text-siz=
e-adjust: 100%;">Oluwatoyin.</span></strong></span></em><strong>=0D=0A<br><=
/strong></div></div>=0D=0A                                                 =
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br><br></span>=0D=0A                                                       =
                 <span>MA<br>Medford<br>Massachusetts<br>20028<br>United St=
ates of America</span></div>=0D=0A                                         =
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                   </tr>=0D=0A                                             =
           </tbody>=0D=0A                                                  =
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g: 0;" valign=3D"top">=0D=0A                                               =
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