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Envelope-to: oyetunde.folarin@rcm.edu.ng
Delivery-date: Mon, 29 Apr 2024 01:30:48 -0400
From: Oluwatoyin Ajilore-Chukwuemeka
 <hellotoyinajilore.gmail.com@send.eocampaign1.com>
To: Oluwaseun Folarin <oyetunde.folarin@rcm.edu.ng>
Subject: What is Love?
Reply-To: hellotoyinajilore@gmail.com
Sender: noreply@sp.eocampaign1.com
MIME-Version: 1.0
Date: Mon, 29 Apr 2024 05:30:38 +0000
Message-ID: <4598c6cf571798ece22f6f3772fca233@sp.eocampaign1.com>
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DEAR OLUWASEUN,=0D=0A=0D=0AIn one of the chapters of my book, Driven, I ask=
ed these questions:=0D=0A=0D=0A"What is love=3F How do you recognize it=3F =
What does a person do that=0D=0Amakes you believe they genuinely love you=
=3F Specifically in a romantic=0D=0Acontext. Buying you flowers=3F Take you=
 to the most expensive dinner=0D=0Aplace=3F Open the car door=3F Check up o=
n you every day=3F How do you know=3F"=0D=0A=0D=0AHaving my wedding anniver=
sary last week has led me to reflect even=0D=0Amore on this. I realized it =
is important to have a good sense of what=0D=0Alove is, so you can properly=
 esteem and handle it when you find it. In=0D=0Athat chapter, I attempted t=
o answer that question, not as someone who=0D=0Aunderstands it fully, but r=
ather from some sense of description based=0D=0Aon experience and keen obse=
rvation. I wrote:=0D=0A=0D=0A_I will say love is kindness. It is in the kin=
dness of thoughts and=0D=0Agentleness of the heart that eventually reflects=
 in words, actions,=0D=0Aand patterns. I will say love is honor. It is in b=
eing each other=E2=80=99s=0D=0Acover from the denigration that exists in th=
e world.=C2=A0_=0D=0A_=0D=0AI will say love is truth. It is in the realizat=
ion that it is only the=0D=0Atruth that sets free and that anything built o=
n a lie would always=0D=0Acollapse. I will say love is labor. It is in the =
realization that=0D=0Anothing good comes easy, and you would both have to c=
ommit to building=0D=0Athe kind of togetherness that you desire._=0D=0A_=0D=
=0AI will say love is readiness. It is the enthusiasm to work things out=0D=
=0Aand to stand together, knowing it is the two of you against the world.=
=0D=0AI will say love is devotion. It is in valuing each other=E2=80=99s th=
oughts,=0D=0Awords, preferences, and idiosyncrasies._=0D=0A_=0D=0AI will sa=
y love is affection. It is in the tender disposition of your=0D=0Ahearts to=
ward each other ultimately culminated in friendship. I will=0D=0Asay love i=
s in attraction, the type that will always live in child-eye=0D=0Awonder of=
 each other.=C2=A0_=0D=0A_=0D=0AI will say love is forgiveness. It is in th=
e willingness to accept=0D=0Aeach other as flawed beings while cultivating =
each other in the=0D=0Apursuit of wholeness. I will say love is nurture. It=
 is the stance of=0D=0Aresponsibility towards each other that expresses its=
elf in support and=0D=0Asacrifice._=0D=0A_=0D=0AI will say love is knowledg=
e. It is in the gift of understanding that=0D=0Ayou intentionally give to e=
ach other. I will say love is vision. It is=0D=0Ain the ability to see wher=
e each other is headed=C2=A0and be each=0D=0Aother=E2=80=99s most important=
 coach and cheerleader._=0D=0A_=0D=0AI will say love is joy. It is the abil=
ity to find pleasure in your=0D=0Atogetherness. I will say love is laughter=
. It is the ability to humor=0D=0Aeach other even in the worst moments.=C2=
=A0_=0D=0A=0D=0A2 years of marriage have made me agree even more with these=
! And if I=0D=0Ahave to add 2 more paragraphs from my vantage point now, it=
 would be:=0D=0A=0D=0A_I will say love is reciprocity. It is in knowing tha=
t "two becoming=0D=0Aone" also implies that "one" must not be viewed in the=
 light of "two"=0D=0Aand nothing is ever really yours alone in a team. I wo=
uld say love is=0D=0Aservice. It is in the willingness to give as much as y=
ou receive also,=0D=0Aor even more._=0D=0A_=C2=A0=0D=0A__I would say love i=
s a gift; it is something you continually choose=0D=0Ato give to each other=
 through the vicissitudes of life. I would say=0D=0Alove is confidence. It =
is knowing that you have a home in each other=0D=0Athat you can always come=
 back to, no matter what._=0D=0A=C2=A0=0D=0AOluwaseun, what does love mean =
to you=3F=0D=0A=0D=0AThink about it this week, and I hope your vision of lo=
ve continues to=0D=0Agrow expansively in truth.=0D=0A=0D=0A_LOVE ALWAYS,_=
=0D=0A_OLUWATOYIN__ __ _ =0D=0A=0D=0AThe measure of what you are able to ac=
complish in line with your=0D=0Adesires is not just about your capacity but=
 also the amount of "space"=0D=0Ayou have in your life.=C2=A0Freeing up mor=
e space in your life, this is=0D=0Athe goal of productivity.=0D=0A=0D=0A =
=09=09 [linkedin social link] [1] =0D=0A=09=09 [instagram social link] [2] =
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